The Importance of Confidence Building in Schools – RAVI VALLURI

The Importance of Confidence Building in Schools – RAVI VALLURI It is often said that schools are the best place for children to know and grow. But it’s very important to understand the environment of the school so that the upbringing of children would be done in a healthy matter. From a survey conducted by The Times Bharat team we have found out that a lot of under confidence issues in writing stem out from schools. Let us talk about this issue in Times Bharat in Collaboration with a branding agency Koala Kraft. We welcome Author Ravi Valluri for an interview. Q1) Namaste Ravi Valluri! We are so glad to have your opinion on this important topic “Confidence Building in Schools.” Tell us a bit about your schooling and did you start writing since childhood? Ans: I was educated in Delhi and my alma mater is St Xavier’s School. My admission to this school is nothing short of a story of faith and miracles which I attribute to the immense confidence in my mother. She fought against all odds and saw to it that I was admitted to this prestigious school in Class 7. I have penned this episode in my autobiographical book “A Story of Faith and Miracles”, available on Amazon. Initially there were several hiccups in school as numbers and science subjects gave me nightmares which I barely managed to pass and soon become a laughing stock in my neighbourhood and school. A tyro from St Michael’s School stepping into the hallowed portals of St Xavier’s School. I was certainly at my wits end, scared to show the term scores, half yearly and final mark sheets to my father fearing a hiding. However, my mother was a pillar of strength who saw to it that I received tuitions in mathematics. Soon in 8th standard my marks skyrocketed from 8/80 to 78/80. Jaws of our neighbours fell as I scored more than their children in the 10th standard board examination. In fact, I was coming out of a severe recurring problem related to the stomach, called malabsorption (where the food consumed just could not be digested and I had a nagging pain in my abdomen) which flared up whenever I was tense after an average performance in the examination, fearing a severe tongue lashing at home. But fortuitously by Divine grace and the prayers of my mother by standard 11th I was catapulted to become a prefect in the school (that is a couple of rungs above a class monitor) and also began participating in school plays, debating, writing for school magazine and sports. I was to win accolades as the best new face award in a Hindi one-act play and also represented my school in the famous play “Andher Nagri Chaupat Raja” written by Bharatendu Harishchandra, which stood second in an inter-school play competition. But the high noon of my school days was when I was selected to participate in a musical production called “Kidstuff”, sponsored by Max Mueller Bhavan and created by Barry John and Param Vir which we performed at Kamani Auditorium, Delhi, Sophia College, Mumbai, Doordarshan and I understand was later staged at Gaiety Theatre, Shimla. We were to also perform at Broadway but narrowly missed the bus. But life is not all hunky dory. My childhood was not exactly troubled, but had health problems related to the stomach, also was a witness to spats between my parents. My mother used to suffer from a heart condition called PAT which was identified much later in life. Those were frightful moments in our lives. I could never learn swimming as the swimming teacher, for reasons best known to him took a dislike towards me. I personally feel we all should be proficient in swimming, driving and being proficient in IT. Unfortunately, I score in none. There was another chutzpah moment in school as I topped the 12th standard examination in Commerce stream to obtain admission in Hindu College Delhi University in B.Com.(Hons). Our English teacher in 11th standard found me to be proficient in English and advised my father that I should read biographies and autobiographies and plays, develop a robust vocabulary and write, apart from continuing with debating. This perhaps gave me the initial stimulus to write. St Xavier’s School paid attention to both academics, extracurricular activities and sports. In my opinion the true development of one’s personality takes place when one gets exposure to all facets of life. Q2) Do you feel that there is favouritism in schools. Have you faced any such issues or do you know someone who has come across an issue like that? Ans: In an ecosystem wherever it is pursuit of academic results/performance and not pursuit of knowledge, there is bound to be favouritism or partiality. Academic institutions, course content and teachers are all sucked into such a cesspool with the poor children/students becoming hapless victims, as marks obtained in schools is a deciding factor for further education. Perhaps that could be a reason that students seeking admission in Delhi University admissions to undergraduate and post graduate programs is done solely through the CUET exam and through Common Seat Allocation System (CSAS). But of late I read that students have lost faith on account of paper leakage and other corruption charges. But I cannot talk about this in a definitive manner. Admissions to various higher educational institutions, defence forces, chartered accountancy among others are now through competitive examinations. So, are Class 12 examinations a preparatory examination? And more than schools, several coaching centres have mushroomed to ‘provide best possible’ score/result. The entire pattern has become highly market driven to identify the one who scores the maximum, he/she need not be the brightest of them all. In many ways I feel there is excessive dependency on rote learning and the ability to recall with element of creativity and surprise being sacrificed in the bargain. And in such an environment academic institution, teachers and the curriculum would favour those students who have higher ability to score marks, retention power and prowess of rote in order to ensure their institution survives. Certainly, we need students who can recall, remember, reproduce for certain skillsets but in my opinion a true visionary is one who is creative, a wager, thinks out of box and is a problem solver. But in the given rat race and dead heat, we are in search for instant results and thus that leads to favouritism and partiality. It is like people getting selected to the Indian cricket team on the basis of their performance in IPL and not the grind of Ranji and Duleep Trophy matches. Performers get appreciated and a large mass of students feel demotivated in such circumstances. There were several of my friends at school who were exceptionally bright but just could not secure adequate marks and felt demotivated when compared with the ones who were scoring highly. Let us revisit the epic Mahabharata. Were Eklavya and Karna not victims of some kind of partiality shown by Guru Dronacharya towards the Pandavas, in particular Arjuna? So much so Eklavya had to sacrifice his thumb and Karna was to feign being a Brahmin to learn the craft of archery under Guru Parashurama and was cursed for uttering a lie. This is something to ponder about. But the epic also reflects on the robustness of our culture and the intellectual honesty on part of the writer to pen such a sensitive subject. Essentially the academic system and evaluation procedure should be fair and devoid of favouritism. It should harness creative minds and talent and not merely rote learning. Let academicians watch “3 Idiots” or the drama “Educating Rita” and listen to Pink Floyd’s iconic lines from “Brick in the Wall’ to judge for themselves what one means by creative challenge and igniting our thought process.  Eva Harshman We don't need no education We don’t need no thought control No dark sarcasm in the classroom Teachers leave them kids alone Hey! Teachers! Leave them kids alone! All in all it's just another brick in the wall. All in all you're just another brick in the wall. giving all students what they need  school Q3) What should be a teacher’s role according to you; to imbibe confidence in kids? Ans: Let us once again revisit the amazing lyrics of the talismanic Pink Floyd’s band. When we grew up and went to school There were certain teachers who would Hurt the children any way they could By pouring their derision Upon anything we did And exposing every weakness However carefully hidden by the kids But out in the middle of nowhere When they got home at night, their fat and Psycopathic wives would thrash them Within inches of their lives Now a non-performing student or one who is aspiring to be an astounding achiever in this Macaulian system of 3Rs and examination pattern may suddenly feel insecure as his/her performance is below par. This is when we say, Ashish’s or Anshu’s self-esteem has hit rock bottom. We tend to blame the student. The child could have been born with either high or low self-esteem. Then they have no other choice but to accept the DNA. Or on account of adverse environmental factors. It is so many factors about which only the child / student is privy and no one else. And this where a sensible, sensitive and skilful teacher’s role comes into play. -Building Self -Esteem This couldn’t be further from the truth. Self-esteem is a construct shaped throughout our students’ childhood and adolescence. It is strongly related to how we as parents and teachers correctly attribute their actions. Establishing realistic expectations for how it is attained is also key. If we tell a student that, is he is clumsy every time he knocks something on the floor, it’s going to be very difficult for his self-esteem to be positive and healthy. The converse is also true. If a student is praised for everything she does and any errors are blamed on others, she might develop self-esteem that is both false and negative which can have a dangerous impact on other students. - Fostering self-esteem The children’s attachment figures must set them goals and tasks that they can attain through effort and sacrifice. The eminent Russian psychologist Lev Vygotsky called this type of objective the Zone of Proximal Development. Healthy self-esteem is not achieved by setting goals the child has already achieved, or by encouraging them to meet unattainable goals. Messi, Michael Phelps, Virat Kohli or say Ussain Bolt are inspiring personalities but not all can become them. Teachers should inspire and develop self-esteem but not make unrealistic comparisons. Children consider their parents and teachers to be singular people who can either calm their frayed nerves or do the exact opposite. We should encourage students to be increasingly more independent and trustworthy. -Mistakes are part of learning Humans and children in particular are different from machines in countless ways, and are bound to make mistakes. Teachers should realise that if a student is making a mistake, he or she is attempting something and not whiling away their time. They should be encouraged and not punished for a fault. I recall during my 10th standard chemistry practical test; I mixed up wrong compounds and solutions which led to a mini explosion and the entire lab could have caught fire. My eyes were burning with the fumes, students were coughing, my books got scorched, but the teacher handled the situation with elan and composure. She extinguished the mini fire, led us out of the room patiently and took me to our school medical clinic. After I was declared fit, she left with a parting advise, “Ravi, be careful next time.” My respect for her grew enormously unlike the swimming teacher who chastised me that I was good-for-nothing and just not fit enough to learn swimming. And till date I have not been able to learn swimming which is one of my big regrets in life. Empowerment Empowerment of our students is mandatory. Believing in them, in their possibilities and telling them what they cannot do or what is dangerous is paramount. Encouraging them, believing in their potential and helping them when they make mistakes is essential. Q4) As we know children spend most of the time in school, around 8-9 hours of the day, do you think that parents and teachers should work effectively to eradicate the problem of under confidence and lack of self-esteem in children? Ans Parents and teachers in tandem should harness the potential of a student by working on their self-confidence and power of resilience. Resilience is the capacity to adapt well when faced with adversity or stress. This innate characteristic helps students to stave off the potential adverse psychological effects of challenging experiences. Resilience goes beyond persistence despite the difficulties encountered.   • Emotional regulation (ability to remain calm and express feelings to improve the situation) • Impulse control (making a conscious choice to act on a desire to act and the ability to delay gratification and perseverance) • Causal analysis (problem analysis and accurate causation) • Empathy (understanding of someone else's feelings and needs) • Realistic optimism (remain positive without negating reality) Developing self- confidence among students A teacher should map the mind of a student and conduct a SWOT analysis of the child and guide the student to pursue the right combination of subjects. For instance, I was selected for the Indian Police Service but was swayed by my father and some cousins not to opt for that particular job. This creates resentment and heart burn among children/ students/tyro professionals. Some how our pedagogy is always in pursuit of perfection and not excellence. This is not advisable for building self-esteem, realistic ground reality and self- confidence. We are merely in the rat race following the rote system not acquiring knowledge but regurgitating information which hardly helps in leading our lives. Teaching methodology should be to allow students to commit mistakes and the learn in life. Or else they become entitled and self-opinionated marionettes who lose out in the battle of life. Teachers should appreciate that self-confidence is an attitude in harnessing skillsets of children/ students and building capacities. It means you accept and trust yourself and have a sense of control in your life to develop self-confidence. Apart from focusing on self-confidence, developing self-esteem and fostering resilience a qualified teacher should create safe and supportive learning environment, celebrate students’ progress, have them set a goal and reflect upon it. It is important to build a sense of belonging in the school community, empowering students with responsibilities and embrace unstructured time and free play. Motivate and praise students, help develop communication skill sets, make students write and discuss about, empathise with their personal problems and educate them about being healthy and maintaining cleanliness. Teachers should treat students as their friends. But how many even attempts to do. I would recommend psychological counselling from class 8 once a child attains puberty as it would go a long way to understand basic concepts of life. This will develop immense camaraderie among students and teachers. Q5) As a writer, what does supportive background mean to you? Ans: We should not miss the wood for the trees. As I have already mentioned the focus should be to develop the personality of the child. However much I may be against the typical ‘rote’ system or the Macaulayan model we cannot brush it aside. Yes, there are schools run by say the Art of Living Foundation, Jiddu Krishnamurthy Foundation, Aurobindo Ashram and Chinmaya Mission, Satya Sai Institutes which pay focus on the over all development of a child’s personality. It is a known fact that not all students can become toppers to don the yellow metal for which they are literally coerced by parents and teachers. Some will stand second and several will fall behind or become laggards. Do all Chandrayan Missions make a soft landing? Why cannot parents, teachers, students, academic institutions and financers understand this simple principle in life? The support system includes a conducive atmosphere at home in school where students can study at peace and not be disturbed with several chores to perform. It is the moral duty of the parents to keep away gizmos from the reach of the students when they are preparing for examinations or studying. Children should have a nutritious diet and spend time in sporting activities, yoga, pranayama, meditation to bolster their physical and mental strength to release positive endorphins and become performers and achievers and not merely memorize lectures and bookworms. Never make comparisons with other students for who knows what lies in the womb of future. Students should be blessed with good physical and mental health. That is why I have advocated the presence of a trained and qualified psychologist who can hear out various issues and problems of children/students. Many a time students are unable to express their demonic thoughts and fears and health problems to parents, teachers and others. A psychologist can provide the necessary sounding box. Next if the student’s parents are not well educated it is paramount that the teachers to play a significant role in carrying the students along in the team and addressing their fears and complexes. The socio-economic condition, sexuality of the child are extremely important factors which are all papered away by the factory of educational system. It is here that teacher’s ought to listen to the ‘inner voice’ of the students and assuage their fears and make them part of the class in a highly demanding atmosphere. This constant comparison in families with neighbors’ children, cousins and fellow students shatters the self-confidence of the students. As a positive support system teacher’s need to provide positive strokes to students so that they can blossom and flower. Only a teacher and a mother can spot the positive quality or the X factor in the child. Why mother? As she carries the child for nine months in her womb and has a special bonding with the child despite the snapping of the umbilical cord. In my opinion – there ought to be a mother-student-teacher triad frequently to address issues of all students whether performing well or not. Teacher’s can easily appreciate as to in which field a student is interested and capable. Thus, there is no point in making a student study science when he or she is interested in commerce or vice versa. Wrong choice wrecks the life of the child. Not all students are A++ graders. Therefore, teachers should counsel the parents and students to do their best and also harness the potential of a child in extracurricular or co-curricular activities. Not all students can become a Dr APJ Abdul Kalam, perhaps there is a Tendulkar or an Amitabh lurking in him. And today there are so many opportunities that everyone need not become a doctor, engineer, IAS officer, chartered accountant. The field is open, it is for the parents and teachers to guide students to discover their talent. Q6) We really thank you for expressing your views on this topic as it would help thousands of people to know about this problem. As a writer what is your thought on this topic? Can you express it in a form of a small quote or sentence? Ans : As an author and a Faculty I fully empathise with this topic and feel that it is something extremely relevant for the health and wealth of all the stake holders. And all stakeholders should sit down and thrash out the issues. Let us not forget the concern of our Hon’bl President of India expressed recently about higher number of suicides and drop outs by Dalit students from IITs. This goes to say positive affirmation is still to reach the bottom most rung of our society. A quote for all stakeholders “He who asks a question is a fool for five minutes; he who does not ask a question remains a fool forever.” —Chinese proverb The pedagogy should make us think not mere