. What is wrong with me that makes me so lonely in life?

other. What is wrong with me that makes me so lonely in life? So I used to feel like that like years ago. And I always felt like I was missing out on things and was like envious of other female relationships and then I learned that not all company is good company, so I started learning how to do things and be comfortable doing things by myself. I started going to the gym, fitness classes and stuff. I started going to eat places by myself not always sit down there, but going to just pick up food because I always felt it looked long if you were doing things like that by yourself. Explore your city. I started going on walks and hikes so nothing to remote or I would say it is dangerous for a woman to be by herself. Yeah, sometimes it’s good to learn whether you are actually lonely or if you’re forced and you don’t know how to actually be alone. I don’t know you so I don’t know the full context to your situation but I just know that I always thought I needed someone and I don’t. I could be in a relationship, but I want it to be right now. I don’t because I’ve been choosing to be alone because I have my sanity but I’m also not blocking a friend or potential significant other if it came along, but not forcing it because I choose not to be lonely. There’s apps as well as like Facebook groups that have meet ups for trivia at night. There’s hiking groups. There’s game night there’s roots for people with relatable hobbies, and these people meet up in person and sometimes awkward. That’s kind of. I guess how adults have to make friends. It’s kind of like some people that say they feel like they’re going to be alone forever, but they never put themselves out there, if you never go to places where you would meet a potential, you may never meet one, if you are at those places and you’re so shut off that you aren’t able to allow someone to come in and potentially make that connection, that can feel rough.(Sometimes not a choice maybe idk)

I'm 38. I've been married for 15 years and have3 kids. My husband is 50. First few years of marriage we were fine though he had exhibited some red flags which I ignored thinking that maybe it's one of those things couples go through with. My husband uses money without consulting with me. Sometimes he would lie to me that he didn't receive his salary he would hide his payslip from me. I would later find the payslip with his full salary. He would apologise and I would forgive him. He continued using finances anyhow but I kept thinking he would change. Last year he took loans up to a point were his salary was a minus. He never told me about the loans till I asked to see his message from the bank that's when I discovered that he had no salary at all,just a minus balance. We argued over the issue and I later found out he had not been paying fees for our kids. He asked for my forgiveness but I was hurt and I told him I wanted a divorce because I was tired of him being an irresponsible husband. Later on I decided to give him another chance. We sat down and came up with a plan to clear up all his debts but he messed up the plans again and said he was sorry. He went on to take another loan again behind my back. Just 4 days ago I discovered he even applied for another loan again behind my back. I'm just tired. We've sought counselling before but he just lies to the counsellor with a straight face. Would I be wrong if I divorce or separate from him for a while? 565.4K views View 4,851 upvotes View 144 shares

I'm 38. I've been married for 15 years and have3 kids. My husband is 50. First few years of marriage we were fine though he had exhibited some red flags which I ignored thinking that maybe it's one of those things couples go through with. My husband uses money without consulting with me. Sometimes he would lie to me that he didn't receive his salary he would hide his payslip from me. I would later find the payslip with his full salary. He would apologise and I would forgive him. He continued using finances anyhow but I kept thinking he would change. Last year he took loans up to a point were his salary was a minus. He never told me about the loans till I asked to see his message from the bank that's when I discovered that he had no salary at all,just a minus balance. We argued over the issue and I later found out he had not been paying fees for our kids. He asked for my forgiveness but I was hurt and I told him I wanted a divorce because I was tired of him being an irresponsible husband. Later on I decided to give him another chance. We sat down and came up with a plan to clear up all his debts but he messed up the plans again and said he was sorry. He went on to take another loan again behind my back. Just 4 days ago I discovered he even applied for another loan again behind my back. I'm just tired. We've sought counselling before but he just lies to the counsellor with a straight face. Would I be wrong if I divorce or separate from him for a while? 565.4K views View 4,851 upvotes View 144 shares. My husband is 50. First few years of marriage we were fine though he had exhibited some red flags which I ignored thinking that maybe it's one of those things couples go through with. My husband uses money without consulting with me. Sometimes he would lie to me that he didn't receive his salary he would hide his payslip from me. I would later find the payslip with his full salary. He would apologise and I would forgive him. He continued using finances anyhow but I kept thinking he would change. Last year he took loans up to a point were his salary was a minus. He never told me about the loans till I asked to see his message from the bank that's when I discovered that he had no salary at all,just a minus balance. We argued over the issue and I later found out he had not been paying fees for our kids. He asked for my forgiveness but I was hurt and I told him I wanted a divorce because I was tired of him being an irresponsible husband. Later on I decided to give him another chance. We sat down and came up with a plan to clear up all his debts but he messed up the plans again and said he was sorry. He went on to take another loan again behind my back. Just 4 days ago I discovered he even applied for another loan again behind my back. I'm just tired. We've sought counselling before but he just lies to the counsellor with a straight face. Would I be wrong if I divorce or separate from him for a while? 565.4K views View 4,851 upvotes View 144 shares

Can extramarital affairs last a lifetime?

Can extramarital affairs last a lifetime? I had an Aunt and Uncle that I adored. My aunt was stricken early in life with heart disease and emphysema. My uncle was her care giver for years. They truly loved one another and he was always very attentive. My uncle got throat cancer at 80 years old. He told me then that he had a girlfriend that he had been with for over 50 years and asked me to visit her with him. I did and understood their love for one another. He wanted me to meet her and stay in touch with her as he was in treatment and I did. He ended up passing away and left things with me to give to her. I know she was devastated. He wife, my aunt passed 4 months later. I am still in touch with his friend. As an older person I understood his need for a partner outside of the marriage. I would have had a problem with it when I was younger because I believe if faithfulness. As I have aged I realize connection is what life is all about. He was loved and loved two women.

Krishna

A warrior par excellence should guard his charioteer also from getting injured or killed. Here the charioteer in question was Narayan himself. Keeping aside the divinity factor,Krishna was the best charioteer anyone ever had. His agility,skills and intelligence could never let the opponent warrior overpower him at all. Drona vouched this fact on 14 th day to Duryodhan. The one who was driven by Krishna was Arjun,the best of the lot,who was ever alert,fast and smart..as per even his arch rival Karna..quoting his words here. Having said that every charioteer would get targeted by the rivals and Krishna was no exception. There was no rule that warriors should not strike charioteers as some people claimed in their posts. It was quite common to kill charioteers in war..Karna,Aswathama,Duryodhana and the Like got their charioteers killed in Kurukshetra battle. Krishna was struck by the above mentioned warriors Some of the occasions where they targeted Krishna.. Karna shot arrows at Krishna in his final battle with Arjuna on 17 th day At that time, Karna, glancing obliquely at Dhananjaya, pierced that foremost of persons, viz., Krishna, with ten shafts whetted on stone and equipped with peacock feathers. Then Dhananjaya, piercing Karna with a dozen well-shot and keen arrows equipped with heads like the boar's ear, sped a cloth-yard shaft endued with the energy of a snake of virulent poison and shot from his bow-string stretched to his ear. That foremost of shafts, well shot by Arjuna, penetrated through Karna's armour, and as if suspending his life breaths, drank his blood and entered the earth, its wings also having been drenched with gore. Endued with great activity, Vrisha, enraged at the stroke of the shaft, like a snake beaten with stick, shot many mighty shafts, like snakes of virulent poison vomiting venom. And he pierced Janardana with a dozen shafts and Arjuna with nine and ninety Bhishma also shot arrows and injured Krishna. Then, O sire, Bhishma with great strength pierced both Vasudeva and Dhananjaya with keen shafts all over their bodies. And mangled by those shafts of Bhishma, those two tigers among men looked like two roaring bulls with the scratches of horns on their bodies. And once again, excited with rage, Bhishma covered the two Krishnas on all sides with shafts in hundreds and thousands. And with those keen shafts of his, the enraged Bhishma caused him of Vrishni's race to shiver Drona also attacked Krishna … Like a mass of clouds pouring torrents of rain, the Drona cloud rained shower on the Partha-mountain. Possessed of great energy, Arjuna received that arrowy downpour, O king, by invoking the Brahma weapon, and cut off all those arrows by arrows of his own. Drona then afflicted Partha of white steeds with five and twenty arrows. And he struck Vasudeva with seventy arrows on the chest and arms. Partha then, of great intelligence, smiling the while resisted the preceptor in that battle who was incessantly shooting sharp arrows. Both Krishna and Arjuna deserve applause for safeguarding themselves against the onslaught of Maharathis Of Kuru army. Krishna was the target too. On 14 th day Srutayudha attacked Krishna with the mace given to him by Varuna with a warning that it should not be hurled on unarmed persons. Srutayudha disobeyed that injunction. With that hero-slaying mace he attacked Janardana, The valiant Krishna received that mace on one of his well-formed and stout shoulders. It failed to shake Sauri, like the wind failing to shake the Vindhya mountain. That mace, returning unto Srutayudha himself, struck that brave and wrathful king staying on his car, like an ill-accomplished act of sorcery injuring the performer himself, and slaying that hero fell down on the earth. Sanjaya admitted to Dhritarashtra that they always asked Karna to use Vasavi Sakti on Arjuna or Krishna Sanjaya said, 'Returning from battle every day, O monarch, all of us, O foremost one of Kuru's race, used to debate in the night and say unto Karna. Tomorrow morning, O Karna, this dart should be hurled at either Kesava or Arjuna.' When, however, the morning came, O king, through destiny, both Karna and the other warriors forgot that resolution. I think destiny to be supreme, since Karna, with that dart in his hands, did not slay in battle either Partha or Devaki's son, Krishna. Infact Arjuna used to get more enraged if the opponents struck Krishna..he would come down heavily on them in response Duryodhana, O king, pierced each of the Krishnas in that battle with nine shafts resembling snakes of virulent poison. And once more the Kuru king showered his shafts on Krishna and the son of Pandu. Beholding these showers of arrows (shot by their king), thy warriors were filled with joy. They beat their musical instrument and uttered leonine roar. Then Partha, excited with rage in that battle, licked the corners of his mouth. Casting his eyes on his enemy's body, he saw not any part that was not well-covered with that impenetrable armour. With some sharp-pointed shafts then, well-shot from his bow, and each of which resembled Death himself, Arjuna slew his antagonist's steeds and then his two Parshni charioteers. And soon also the valiant Partha cut off Duryodhana's bow and the leathern fence of his fingers. Then, Savyasachin commenced to cut off his enemy's car in fragments. And with a couple of keen arrows he made Duryodhana carless. And then Arjuna pierced both the palms of the Kuru king. Beholding that great bowman afflicted with the shafts of Dhananjaya and fallen into great distress, many warriors rushed to the spot, desirous of rescuing him.

Bountiful God’s Own Country

Bountiful God’s Own Country “In the beginning, God created the earth, and He looked upon it in His cosmic loneliness.” And God said, “Let us make living creatures out of mud, so the mud can see what we have done.” “Everything must have a purpose?” asked God. “Certainly,” said man. “Then I leave it to you to think of one for all this,” said God. And He went away.” ― Kurt Vonnegut Call it God, nature or divinity, there is scant doubt that cosmic forces conspired to make the southern state of Kerala alluring and prepossessing, beckoning tourists in humungous numbers to savour the scenic beauty, temples, churches, mosques and synagogues, embellished with ornate architectural design, lush green fields, swaying coconut trees, awe-inspiring beaches, sublime backwaters and lagoons. This oasis of natural creation and design lingers in the memory bank of the trippers’ mind. The state of Kerala is all about vast green expanses that would take at least a fortnight to traverse and to explore the gem-spots spread across ‘God’s Own Country’. In a span of one week an enterprising excursionist can discover the charm of the Kochi, Munnar (a quaint hill station), Thekkady (a wildlife sanctuary), Alappuzha (the stupefying backwaters- also famous for the famous Nehru boat race) and the exotic beaches at Kovalam. The IRCTC proffers an attractive package which lures the interested tourists. Guests are received by a representative of IRTC at the Kochi airport and housed at an upmarket hotel. The local sight-seeing includes a visit to the Mattancherry Palace, constructed by the Portuguese for the king of Cochin as a gift. Subsequently it was taken over by the Dutch, whence it came to be known as the Dutch Palace. The Mattancherry Palace is notable for the Kerala murals depicting portraits and exhibits of the Rajas of Kochi. It is a matter of immense pride that the palace has been included in the list of UNESCO World Heritage Sites. The sightseeing trip includes a visit to the Paradesi Synagogue, the oldest active synagogue in the Commonwealth of Nations. The tour winds up at the charming seaside area, Fort Kochi, known for its Dutch, Portuguese, and British colonial architecture and elaborate bamboo fishing nets. The St. Francis Church is also located in the robust fort complex which was the original burial site of the intrepid explorer, Vasco da Gama. The following morning guests drive to Munnar, the ‘Princess of Hill Stations’. While traversing to Munnar trippers watch in amazement the Cheeyappara and Valara waterfalls. On reaching Munnar, tourists can spend quality time walking through the verdant grasslands and tea plantations. Vacationers can also visit the most prepossessing location there, situated across the Mattupetty Dam, where one can enjoy a spot of boating in the Mattupetty Lake. After an overnight stay at Munnar, sightseers head to Periyar- a 4-hour drive through viridescent mountains. The Periyar Wildlife Sanctuary houses variegated species of flora and fauna. Guests are then taken on a boat ride in the artificial lake inside the sanctuary. The mysteries of natural beauty never cease in Kerala. Yet another treat awaits, as guests drive towards the world’s most beautiful backwater destination, Alappuzha. Upon reaching the destination, tourists hastily hop on a houseboat and relish a cruise along the backwaters of Alappuzha, floating through the narrow canals and witnessing the local life and savouring the local cuisine prepared on board by the crew. As the shadows lengthen and there is a hush, except an odd chirping and some fish making their passage in the water to their sanctuary, tourists can spend a relaxing night in the house boat. At crack of the dawn, the brawnier tourist takes a quick swim and soon after a sumptuous breakfast, the globetrotters disembark from houseboat to resume the tour with a drive to Kovalam, a spectacular beach destination, and rightly termed as the ‘Goa of the South’. On reaching Kovalam, visitors embrace the Hawa beach and enjoy the rest, in sync with the harmonious natural surroundings and luxuriating at a calm pace. The icing on the cake is witnessing the crimson sun sink into the Arabian Sea. The following morning tourists are guided by the energetic officials of the IRCTC to the Thiruvananthapuram International airport after paying obeisance at the famous Anantha Padmanabha Swamy Temple, the Napier Museum and the Kuthira Malika (also known as Horse Palace). So, in a matter of seven days, one has a glimpse of the wondrous and spectacular holiday spots of Kerala which leaves a deep impression on the mind and one is surely pining for more. “Nature is so powerful, so strong. Capturing its essence is not easy - your work becomes a dance with light and the weather. It takes you to a place within yourself,” writes the talismanic American portrait photographer, Annie Leibovitz.

ELEPHANTA, AJANTA AND ELLORA CAVES

ELEPHANTA, AJANTA AND ELLORA CAVES The art or practice of designing and constructing buildings is synonymous with the field of study of architecture. The exploration of Indian Architecture presents a tripper with a variegated bouquet to certain quintessential travel destinations in India which provides an opportunity to witness its abundant heritage. The Indian Railway Catering and Tourism Corporation (IRCTC) has proffered a visual treat to a sightseer stock individual and accomplished/ novitiate architects and sculptors a unique trip which covers the caves of Elephanta, Ajanta and Ellora. Upon arriving at the financial capital of India, Mumbai a tripper is received by the officials of IRCTC and checked into an upmarket hotel. The following day the guests inhale the ozone emitted by the Arabian sea during an hour-long ferry ride from the Gateway of India to the Elephanta Island in the Mumbai Harbour. The caves are tucked away in a desolate island which in common parlance are referred to as Gharapuri (city of caves). These caverns are approximately 10 kilometres east of the Gateway of India. The caves, as well as the island, were christened as Elephanta by Portuguese invaders once they became suzerains of what is today known as Mumbai in the year1534. It was a happenstance discovery of a gigantic rock-cut sculpture of an elephant on the island which prompted them to name the place after the tusker. Sometime in 1661, the East India Company overpowered the Portuguese armies and the area became part of their dominion. Over time, these caves suffered significant damage and destruction by Persian invaders, Christian Portuguese soldiers, the Maratha as well as British rulers. In 1909, the British India officials initiated major attempts to safeguard the caves from further wreckage. Subsequently the Government of India carried out restoration works at the site in the 1970s and converted the place into remarkable heritage sites. Each cave has been carved as a rock-cut temple with one principal massive chamber, courtyards, two lateral chambers, and minor shrines. Cave 1 or what is also called the Grand Cave is the largest one among these which spreads across 39 meters from its entrance to the back. After the sojourn to Elephanta Caves, tourists normally chill it out, take a walk on the marine drive and are ready to drop anchorage at exploring next set of caves in the vicinity of Aurangabad the next pit stop. Aurangabad is 365 kilometres from Mumbai and the aficionados of IRCTC arrange for ferrying tourists by rail to witness the grandeur of Ajanta and Ellora caves. The formidable Ajanta Caves have been prominently mentioned in the memoirs of several medieval-era Chinese Buddhist travellers to India and by satraps of Mughal emperor Akbar in the early 17th century. These brawny caves were once covered by a humungous thicket until fortuitously they were "discovered" and drew large scale western attention and acclaim in the year 1819 by a colonial British officer Captain John Smith who was on a tiger-poaching expedition. The caves are in the rocky northern wall of the U-shaped gorge of the river Waghur, in the Deccan plateau. Within the gorge are several breathtaking waterfalls with gushing waters which break the tranquillity of the pristine place and are audible from the vicinity of caves when the river course reaches a crescendo. Commencing with the 2nd century B.C., and continuing into the 6th century A.D., the paintings and sculptures in the caves of Ajanta and Ellora, were inspired by Buddhism and its compassionate teachings and unleashed a surge of artistic excellence unmatched in human history. About 107 km from the city of Aurangabad in Maharashtra, are the rock-out caves of Ajanta which are neatly nestled in a panoramic gorge, in the form of a gigantic horseshoe. These elaborate sculptures and paintings stand tall in the impressive grandeur in spite of withstanding the ravages of time. Amid the beautiful images and paintings are sculptures of Buddha, with a soothing and serene depiction in deep state of meditation. The cave temples and monasteries at Ellora, which were excavated out of the vertical face of an escarpment, are 26 km north of Aurangabad. Sculptors, inspired by strains of thought of Buddhism, Jainism and Hinduism, created elaborate rock carvings. Extending in a linear arrangement, the 34 caves contain Buddhist Chaityas or halls of worship, Viharas or monasteries and Hindu and Jain temples. Spanning a period of around 600 years between the 5th and 11th century A.D., the earliest excavation here is of the Dhumar Lena (Cave 29). This three-day package suffuses the minds of the tripper with amazement of ancient Indian architecture and they are left awestruck as to how aeons ago Indian architects and sculptors created this work of marvel and sheer jollity. “If a building becomes architecture, then it is art,” writes Danish architect Arne Jacobsen known for architectural functionalism.

Caves to Visit in Central and Southern India

Caves to Visit in Central and Southern India By Ravi Valluri An air of mystery envelopes as one enters caves. They are treasure troves of history, culture, religiosity and spirituality. Some of them remain in pristine state and have become spots for the seeker and backpacker alike. Madhya Pradesh is singularly known for the Bagh and Bhimbetka caves. While the former is a collection of nine rock-cut caves (replete with mural paintings) which were apparently constructed by a Buddhist Monk Dataka near Baghani river and trace their history to the Gupta period. Bhimbhetka consists of majestic caves situated at the Ratapani Wildlife Sanctuary in Madhya Pradesh and housed the fabled Pandavas (who were robbed of their kingdom by the deviant Shakuni) during their period of exile. Down South is a treat to eyes for the globetrotter are the Badami, Borra, Varaha, Undavalli, Belum and Sittanvasala caves. Badami with four caves located in Karnataka is a veritable religious spot, where caves are dedicated to the preserver and destroyer of Hindu pantheon apart from Jainism. These are red sandstone cut caves at the precipice of a hill. Close to Ananthagiri hills of the Araku Valley near Vishakapattanam, are the famous Borra Caves which are venerated by the local tribal community and has emerged as a popular Hindu pilgrimage spot due to the presence of a naturally developed Shiv Lingam inside the caves which leaves an emmet awestruck. In addition, a tourist is arrested by the sight of the 1km tract populated with stalactites and stalagmites. A traveller is struck by sheer majesty of the Varaha Caves, in Tamil Nadu named after the avatar of Lord Vishnu, the preserver. This rock-cut cave has been accorded the prestigious UNESCO World Heritage title for its sheer architectural marvel. Meanwhile located 8 kms away from the historic city of Vijaywada, are the Undavalli caves at the banks of the River Krishna in Andhra Pradesh. A tourist propitiates Hindu deities like Anantapadmanabha Swamy and Narasimha Swamy. Sandstone was cut by Vishnukundin Kings in 7th century AD to construct these caves. The Undavalli Caves near Amravati in Andhra Pradesh are popular for the gigantic statue of Lord Vishnu which is in a reclining position. The pilgrim or a traveller is required to crawl though to have a look. There are caves located at the small village of Sittanavasal in the Pudukottai district of the state of Tamil Nadu. These caves are also called as the Arivar Koli in local dialect and date back to the 7th Century AD. A large number of beautiful paintings inscribed are found in these astonishing caves which leaves an explorer stunned. The paintings are inscribed all over the cave walls which form a major attraction for visitors. Some of the finest ones being – people collecting lotuses from ponds, lilies, geese, fish, buffaloes, elephants and two dancing figures and lotus flowers. Belum caves in Rayalseema region of Andhra Pradesh are known for long passages, galleries, spacious caverns, stalactites and stalagmites all formed over thousand of years on account of the flow of the Chitravati River which mysteriously disappeared. These caves of Central and South India are filled with mystery, enigma and an undying sense of adventure, which beckons the tourist to explore many more across the country. About the Author: Ravi Valluri was Principal Chief Commercial Manager, Southern Railway and author of Bombay Review and Other Stories.