OUR PRIMARY PURPOSE
The more A.A. sticks
to its primary purpose,
the greater will be
its helpful influence everywhere.
A.A. COMES OF AGE, p.109
It is with gratitude that I reflect
on the early days of our Fellowship
and those wise and loving “fore-steppers”
who proclaimed that
we should not be diverted
from our primary purpose,
that of carrying the message to the alcoholic
who still suffers.
I desire to impart respect
to those who labor in the field of alcoholism,
being ever mindful that A.A. endorses
no causes other than its own.
I must remember that A.A.
has no monopoly on miracle-making
and I remain humbly grateful
to a loving God who made A.A. possible.
******************************
Citizens Again
"Each of us in turn –
that is, the member who gets
the most out of the program –
spends a very large amount of time
on Twelfth Step work in the early years.
That was my case, and perhaps I should not
have stayed sober with less work.
"However, sooner or later
most of us are presented with other obligations –
to family, friends, and country.
As you will remember,
the Twelfth Step also refers to
`practicing these principles in all our affairs.'
Therefore, I think your choice of whether
to take a particular Twelfth Step job
is to be found in your own conscience.
No one else can tell you for certain
what you ought to do at a particular time.
"I just know that you are expected, at some point,
to do more than carry the message of A.A.
to other alcoholics.
In A.A. we aim not only for sobriety –
we try again to become citizens of the world
that we rejected, and of the world that once rejected us.
This is the ultimate demonstration toward
which Twelfth Step work
is the first but not the final step."
LETTER, 1959
******************************
That's what happens
when you're angry at people.
You make them part of your life.
—Garrison Keillor
Our problems with anger
and our problems in relationships go hand in hand.
Some of us have held back our anger,
which led to resentment of our loved ones.
Some of us have indulged our anger
and become abusive.
Some of us have been so frightened of anger
that we closed off the dialogue in our relationships
when angry feelings came out.
Some of us have wasted our energy
by focusing anger on people
who weren't really important to us.
Do we truly want them to become so important?
Yet, perhaps the important relationships
got frozen because we weren't open and respectful
with our anger.
It isn't possible to be close to someone
without being angry at times.
We let our loved ones be part of our lives
by feeling our anger when it is there
and expressing it openly,
directly, and respectfully to them -
or by hearing them when they are angry.
Then, with dialogue, we can let it go.
I will be aware of those people
I am making important in my life
and will grow in dealing with my anger.
*************
Just a thought………………..
A "slip" is sometimes defined as
"Sobriety Losing Its Priority."
It's when we stop doing the things, we did to get sober.
It's a return to the insane thinking that
somehow this time when we drink it will be different.
It is only possible when we lose the gut-level knowledge
and certainty that we are powerless over alcohol
and that our lives are unmanageable when we use alcohol.
So…………….
How many times have we heard people
picking up another desire chip
describe how in the period before their "slip"
they had stopped going to meetings,
stopped working with others,
stopped calling their sponsors,
and stopped reading their Big Book?
How are we doing in terms of meetings,
calling our sponsors,
working with others and reading the Big Book?
What are we doing today
to maintain a fit spiritual condition?
"Slip" may sound accidental,
but isn't it really premeditated?
*
In 1938,
Dilemma –
Situation in which one must choose
between two alternatives –
both of which are bad.
~ The Winston Simplified Dictionary
Encyclopedic Edition (1938)
“Lack of power, that was our dilemma.” (45:0)
******************************
Accepting Change
The winds of change blow through our life,
sometimes gently, sometimes like a tropical storm.
Yes, we have resting places -
time to adjust to another level of living,
time to get our balance, time to enjoy the rewards.
We have time to catch our breath.
But change is inevitable and desirable.
Sometimes, when the winds of change begin to rustle,
we're not certain the change is for the better.
We may call it stress or a temporary condition,
certain we'll be restored to normal. Sometimes, we resist.
We tuck our head down and buck the wind,
hoping that things will quickly calm down,
get back to the way things were.
Is it possible we're being prepared for a new normal?
Change will sweep through our life, as needed,
to take us where we're going.
We can trust that our Higher Power has a plan in mind,
even when we don't know where the changes are leading.
We can trust that the change-taking place is good.
The wind will take us where we need to go.
Today, help me, God, to let go
of my resistance to change.
Help me be open to the process.
Help me believe that the place
I'll be dropped off
will be better than the place
where I was picked up.
Help me surrender, trust, and accept,
even if I don't understand.
************
Heard at AA Meeting
"If you always do what you always did,
you'll always get what you always got!"
*
In 1938,
Makeup –
the way in which
the parts of anything are put together
~ The Winston Simplified Dictionary
Encyclopedic Edition (1938)
“We finally saw that faith in some kind of God
was a part of our make-up,
just as much as the feeling we have for a friend.”
(55:3)
******************************
Some of us,
observing that ideals are rarely achieved,
proceed to the error
of considering them worthless.
Such an error is greatly harmful.
True North cannot be reached either,
since it is an abstraction,
but it is of enormous importance,
as all the world's travelers can attest.
—Steve Allen
How many of us,
seeing others who failed to live fully by their ideals,
cried, "Hypocrite!"
Perhaps we even pointed to others' shortcomings
to excuse our own.
Now, in this program,
we may be tempted to swing
like a pendulum to the other extreme.
We may hold to our values and principles so tightly
that we are perfectionistic.
The idea that True North
cannot ever be reached is very useful.
If we don't achieve True North,
even though we establish it as our standard,
we will generally be heading in the right direction.
Although we never perfectly achieve our ideals,
they remain our standards today for orienting our lives.
I do accept standards for my life.
I will not beat on myself
for my imperfections.
******************************
Each day is different
and has a surprise in it,
like a Cracker Jack box.
--Alpha English
It's interesting to ponder the notion of surprise.
Not every one of them is all that welcome.
Hearing bad news about a friend
or having a special trip we'd been counting on canceled
can leave us dismayed and worried,
right along with surprised.
Seeking solace from others while
cultivating a willingness to accept that
all things happen for a reason gives us the armor we need
to make the best of every situation and disappointment.
It's an interesting image to think of each day
as a box of Cracker Jacks.
The moments of our lives have been very tasty.
Some were sweet, some were a bit salty,
and there were always wholly unexpected moments,
the surprises that we were ready for even though
we may not have imagined as much.
We can look forward to the same daily agenda
throughout the remaining years.
Does it help to know that there is a divine plan
unfolding in our lives?
Many of us find comfort in that.
All of us can cultivate that belief.
I am ready for my surprise today!
It is meant for me at this time.
************
Detachment
Today I will practice detachment
by letting go of things I can't control.
Detachment means standing back
and looking at a situation
without having a hand in it.
Watching fireworks is practicing detachment.
Flying a kite is not.
Allowing friends, the freedom
to have their own opinions is practicing detachment.
Feeling compelled to change their minds is not.
Watching a child create her own drawing
is practicing detachment.
Holding her hand while she draws is not.
I can't control other people, their actions, or their beliefs
by forcing them to act or believe as I do.
Detachment helps me see the big picture,
since I can see things more clearly from a distance.
Today, and from now on,
I will practice taking care of myself by detaching
from people or situations that aren't good for me.
Today I will pay close attention
to when I am trying to force the issue,
and I'll remember that my time
would be better spent leaving it alone.
******************************
Key to Sobriety
The unique ability of each A.A. to identify himself with,
and bring recovery to, the newcomer
in no way depends upon his learning, his eloquence,
or any special individual skills.
The only thing that matters is
that he is an alcoholic who has found a key to sobriety.
In my first conversation with Dr. Bob,
I bore down heavily
on the medical hopelessness of his case,
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