Political Jokes

The problem with political jokes is that they get elected.                                     ~ Henry Cate ~   

We hang the petty thieves and appoint the great ones to public office. 
~ Aesop ~     

If we got one-tenth of what was promised to us in these political speeches, there wouldn't be any inducement to go to heaven.                                                          ~ Will Rogers ~     

Politicians are the same all over.  They promise to build a bridge even where there is no river.                                                                                                     ~ Nikita Khrushchev ~     

When I was a boy, I was told that anybody could become President; I'm beginning to believe it.                                                                                                           ~ Clarence Darrow ~                                                                                                                                                                                                             
Politics is supposed to be the second-oldest profession. I have come to realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first.                                               ~ Ronald Reagan ~     

Politics is the gentle art of getting votes from the poor and campaign funds from the rich, by promising to protect each from the other.                                         ~ Oscar Ameringer ~     

I offer our opponents a bargain; if they will stop telling lies about us, we will stop telling the truth about them.                                                                                  ~ Adlai Stevenson ~     

A politician is a fellow who will lay down your life for his country.
~ Tex Guinan ~      

I have come to the conclusion that politics is too serious a matter to be left to the politicians.                                                                                                        ~ Charles de Gaulle ~     

Instead of giving a politician the keys to the city, it might be better to change the locks.                                                                                                               ~ Doug Larson ~